spicybrown
Grumble.
This sucks. I wanted to switch my domain registration from Register.com, and once again, due to my forgetting the renewal date, Register.com has my $35. One. More. Year.
Sigh.
Really? This is what we’re reduced to in the App Store?
Pillow Talk After 8 Years Of Marriage
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Stomach:GURRRRGLE
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Me:You hear that? That's my stomach growling. It sounds like a cat! That's how you know you've been around cats too long, you start to sound like them!
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Wife:that's funny...
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Stomach:GURRRRGLE
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Me:How you like THEM apples?
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Wife:I don't like those apples at all!
Spaghetti
For 2 years a man was having an affair with an Italian woman.
One night, she confided in him that she was pregnant. Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, He paid her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child. If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18.
She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born.
To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write ‘Spaghetti’ on the back.
He would then arrange for the child support payments to begin.
One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
‘Honey!,’ she said, ‘you received a very strange post card today.’
‘Oh, just give it to me and I’ll explain it later,’ he said. The wife obeyed and watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.
On the card was written:
Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti.
Three with meatballs, two without.
Send extra sauce.
What The Hell Am I Eating 16: Japanese Nattō

